found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize