If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Randomize
