Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
are you so shy because you have an std?
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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