I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
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