I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
I just found a bag of teeth...
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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