He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
