he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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