You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Randomize
