yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
