Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
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