i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
Randomize
