When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
