Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
Randomize
