Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
