out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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