I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Randomize