I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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