Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Randomize