hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
You may now shotgun with the bride
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Randomize
