I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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