I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Randomize
