went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
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