My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
Randomize
