and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Randomize