I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
