Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
