CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
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