It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
