who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Randomize
