I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Randomize
