so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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