So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
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