i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Randomize
