bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
