are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Randomize