What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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