it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
Randomize