i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
I just found puke in my bra..
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
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