At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
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