I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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