i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
Randomize
