used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
