Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
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