I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize