is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
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