Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Randomize
