You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Randomize
