you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I'm experimenting with sincerity
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize