Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
