bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
